Just as she was starting to feel overwhelmed, Emily's imagination took over. She pictured herself in a fantastical world, one where COVID didn't exist, and people could connect freely. In this world, she was on a quest to find a magical cure, one that would not only heal her but also bring people together.

The sober, healthy mind would never admit to loneliness, fear of death, or financial anxiety. The 4am COVID mind has no such armor. “I’m 27 and I live alone and if I stopped breathing right now, my landlord wouldn’t find me until the rent is late. I wrote this so someone knows I existed.”

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If you’re reading this while stuck in your own 4 AM COVID fog: put the phone down, drink some water, and try to get some rest. That "life-changing" link can probably wait until your temperature drops.

“i wrote this at 4am sick with covid link (i don’t have covid, i just ate too much cheese before bed and had a weird dream).”

As I continue to write this at 4am, sick with COVID, I'm aware of the privilege it is to be able to express myself in this way. Not everyone has the same opportunity, the same access to technology, or the same ability to articulate their experiences.